Nev Judd: Online and out there

Archive for May 2012

Rattled, but OK

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Lack of a zoom, not to mention bowel-shrinking fear, prevented me from getting a better shot of the Diamondback rattlesnake. My golf ball is in that bush somewhere.

The Diamondback rattlesnake can be a nasty piece of work. Get bitten and you can expect pain, bleeding, severe swelling, bruising, blistering, and necrosis, headache, nausea, vomiting, abdominal pain, diarrhea, dizziness, and convulsions. (I’m guessing there’s probably a nasty rash in there, too.)

If you’re a Canucks fan, think Game 7 versus Boston, with a reasonable chance of death thrown in.

So when I trod on a Diamondback rattlesnake last week, I didn’t really have time to think about any of that. I was looking for a golf ball; my third lost golf ball in as many holes at a Tucson, Arizona course. The first I heard was a hiss, or maybe more of a ‘shush’.

(I would learn later that in Parseltongue, ‘shush’ means: “Prepare to die”.)

I looked down.

I leapt backwards.

About six feet.

I’m not sure the experts recommend that response, but then looking a cougar in the eye never struck me as realistic. Or are you supposed to look away. Can’t remember.

Shock gave way to curiosity, and with my bowels under control, I edged a little closer to the dusty, brown coil of fury. And like any dumb tourist would, I slowly reached for my cell phone and snapped the lame, off-focus photo you see above.

“You know, they can move pretty fast,” said one of my playing partners, from about 100 feet away.

I don’t like golf much. Unfortunately it shows.

But I will say this: You’d be surprised how straight you hit a ball after stepping on a snake.

Written by nevjudd

May 17, 2012 at 9:41 pm